It’s often said that there is no greater pain in life than losing a loved one. Although dealing with the loss of a loved one is never easy, for those entering the golden years of their life, the grieving process can take a particularly heavy toll. Fortunately, there are healing strategies that can help those dealing with loss and grief in later life. In this article, explore how to cope and find healing.
1. Coming to Terms with Loss and Grief in Later Life
As we age, we come to expect certain changes: wrinkles, grey hair, and unfortunately, a greater likelihood of loss. In later life, grief particularly related to the death of a loved one is something many of us will come to terms with. When you know death is inevitable, it can be difficult to grapple with the concept of missing someone for the rest of your life. Here are some ways to help you work through the sadness:
- Give Yourself Time: You don’t have to rush to find closure or move on from the loss. Allow yourself to take breaks whenever needed to validate and express your emotions.
- Stay Connected: You can stay connected to your loved one some other ways. Connect with people who knew the person, write a letter, create a memorial, or listen to music that reminds you of them.
If these simple tactics don’t provide adequate relief, speaking with a therapist experienced in working with grief can help. It can feel overwhelming to face the larger aspects of living with the loss, but a trained professional can assist you in managing these feelings. Additionally, joining a grief support group can be a great way to share your story and meet others with a similar loss.
The process looks different for everyone. In dealing with loss in later life, it’s important to be gentle with yourself and know that you don’t have to go at it alone. Seeking assistance in moments of sadness and confusion is nothing to be ashamed of; rather it is a meaningful step in finding peace and comfort during a difficult time.
2. Finding Comfort Through Healing Strategies
Finding solace as a survivor of trauma is never easy and can be a lengthy process. While it may feel impossible to trust yourself and the world around you, there are strategies out there to help you on your journey. Here are a few to get you started:
- Create a Safe Space: Create a safe place to ground and express yourself, like a journal, a friend or a therapist. The key is to create a loving and nurturing environment before you take the next step of exploring your feelings.
- Practice Self-Care: Self-care is a critical step in healing and nourishing your soul. This could mean taking a hot bubble bath, going for a walk in nature, watching a movie with friends, or whatever else makes you feel safe and happy.
- Respect Your Feelings: Respect the way you may feel at any given time without judgment. Rather than trying to suppress your feelings, take time to explore them, honor your emotions and find healthier outlets for them.
- Focus on Gratitude: Make an effort to appreciate the positive things in your life, however small they may be. It can be as simple as taking a moment to be thankful for having a bed to sleep in or the moon and stars in the night sky. Making gratitude a daily practice will help to balance out the negative feelings.
Experiencing trauma is difficult and no two journeys are exactly the same. Taking the time to focus on healing and finding comfort is the best way to move through the pain. You don’t have to do it alone, either; reach out for help and find out what works best for you.
Remember to take things day by day and be kind to yourself. You got this.
3. Easing into a New Normal: Finding Joy After Loss
Following the loss of a loved one, it can be hard to adjust to the new normal that will be your life. But, finding joy after loss is possible and can happen in its own unique way. Here are some suggestions to help ease into a new normal.
- Allow yourself to feel all the emotions: Pain, anger, sorrow, relief – it is natural to experience all kinds of feelings after a loss, so allow yourself to feel these without suppression or judgment.
- Find purpose in your life: When someone you love dies, you may be left feeling at a loss. To help with re-finding purpose in life try to take on a new activity or hobby that you feel passionate about.
- Spend time with those who can provide support and good memories: In this difficult time, reach out to those who know and love the person you lost. This could provide comfort as well as the chance to share stories about that person.
Develop a routine and boundary: It is important to feel like you are in control so set a routine and create healthier boundaries so that your time away from the grief is balanced. This could mean creating a daily routine or setting an amount of time each day for being in control of your grief process.
Try to keep your soul open to joy: Grief can be all-encompassing but it is important to remember that life will move on even after a loss. Even if feeling overwhelmed or despairing, allowing moments of joy to come through is possible and can strengthen you.
4. Supportive Resources to Help You Cope
It’s important to know that you don’t have to cope alone. Supportive resources are available to help you through challenging times. Here are a few resources you can access to get help navigating and understanding your emotions.
- Your doctor or counselor: Your primary care physician or therapist can be a good source of support and guidance for dealing with your emotions. They can help you find deeper understanding of your feelings and provide helpful suggestions, such as medications that can help improve your mood.
- Support groups: There are numerous support groups available online and in-person that are designed to help people manage difficult emotions. Discussing your challenges with peers can provide helpful insight and the understanding that you’re not alone in your difficult experiences.
- Meditation and mindfulness: Mindfulness and meditation have been proven to help reduce stress, anxiety, and depression. Make time in your day to practice these techniques and find ways to tune into your innermost thoughts and feelings.
- Yoga and exercise: Exercise has been proven to reduce stress and help you feel better. Try a yoga class or go for a walk each day, and make time to move your body and get outside for fresh air.
Finally, it’s important to be gentle with yourself and practice self-care. Make sure you’re taking time each day to appreciate yourself, and practice positive affirmations to remind yourself of your worth. And most importantly, don’t be afraid to seek help. It’s important to recognize when emotions are too strong to cope with on your own.
5. Seeking Professional Help: Facilitating the Grieving Process
Going through a period of mourning is a unique experience for everyone, as is the way of gaining closure and healing. It is important to find professional help if you are struggling to cope with the grief and to facilitate the grieving process. Professional help can come in many forms. Here are some to consider:
- Counselors: If you are struggling to process your loss, professional counselors can help you explore different coping mechanisms. They can provide you with tools to use while dealing with grief, as well as a safe space to express your feelings.
- Support Groups: It can be great to talk to a group of people whom have experienced similar losses. Many communities have support groups dedicated to those who are grieving, or who are experiencing similar difficult emotions. These meetings can be encouraging and uplifting.
- Clergy: For spiritual guidance and insight, clergy can help you make sense of your loss and cope. Your faith can be a great source of comfort and hope. Be sure to find a professional you can trust, and who is well versed in issues of loss.
- Therapy: Therapy offers a great outlet to gain closure and to heal. Therapists help you process your loss, get to the root of complicated emotions, and give you the tools to move forward. Consider both traditional and alternative therapies.
Grief is a personal and complex experience that everyone faces differently. It is best to find the professional help that meets your individual needs and helps make the grieving process that much more bearable. Everyone can benefit from professional help.
As the saying goes, time heals all wounds. But sometimes, quick healing may be difficult. Through support from family and friends, understanding the stages of grief, and finding, as well as participating in, productive ways to cope with the pain, the hope of a better tomorrow is nothing short of possible. To those who are dealing with the traumatic loss of a loved one, it is important to remember that the sun will come out and you will be able to find happiness again.
